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That time when I realised that all you need is love

I have woken up this morning surrounded by love. Does that mean that I stayed with friends? No. Did I stay with my parents? No. Did I have someone with me? No. I woke alone. In an empty flat.

So how is this possible? Well, my dear friends, it’s possible, because I have the most amazing love from the most incredible person ever, that surrounds me and flows through me all the time. Who is that? Me.

I show me that I love me all the time. You know, it’s the little thoughtful things I do that I love most about me. I love:

  • the fact that I always put my clothes away straight away, because I know that the me that wakes up in the morning or comes home from work, doesn’t want that to deal with.
  • the way I buy/use my favourite products, and I make sure that nothing ever runs out, because I know how stroppy that can make me feel.
  • the fact I make/prepare beautifully nourishing food, and choose what to eat around the things that I like the best, and the food that I know nourishes and supports my body in the best way. I sometimes even bake for me as a special treat.
  • the way I clean as I go and I always do the washing up straight away. I know that I don’t want to leave that for me to find at a later time, I want me to come home to a clean, tidy home. I know how much I love getting into fresh, clean bedding, so I make that a regular occurrence.
  • that I make sure I get plenty of sleep, and that my quality of sleep is good. I know that when I’m feeling depleted, I need to be extra careful about this. That doesn’t mean I never go out late, it just means that I know when it’s better for me to stay at home. I am also careful to select activities that support me in the best way.
  • that I take myself on amazing dates. Sometimes planned, sometimes not. I am always looking for new places to take me to.
  • that I make sure I get to do the things that make my heart sing regularly – that includes dancing, singing and eating amazing food. I do silly things that make me giggle, and that I’m not afraid to act the fool, alone or in company.
  • that I make sure I take the time to nurture friendships and relationships with amazingly loving and supportive people so that we cherish one another. I love that they are all so different from one another, and that we give each other different things.
  • the fact that I work hard, in a job I love and that I make sure that job makes me enough money to provide myself with a beautiful home to live in.
  • the way I always make sure that I leave the house feeling amazing every day. I love the way I take the extra care to make sure that my hair is done, and my make up is just how I like it. I also love the way I always give myself the extra time to dress appropriately to how I’m feeling – so if I get it wrong first time, there is always time to change.
  • and I really love the way I project myself positively into the world, in almost every interaction. I know that if I greet the world with love and enthusiasm, that’s usually the energy they give me right back. It makes going out and about with me a super fun experience, and I never know who we might meet.

So you see folks, love really is all around me. And because I make sure of that, when life presents me with something unexpected (which it often does), I know I have all that love around me and in me, to keep me warm and help me through that temporary storm. I am able to accept the things that aren’t meant for me gracefully, and refocus on the things that are.

I spent a long time searching for love outside of myself and it never came. Now I know that’s it’s me who is love, and that, whilst it’s beautiful to share your life and love with another person who also is love and for your respective loves to grow together in harmony; I also know that love doesn’t end if that person chooses to leave. My love remains, just a little older and a little wiser.

I am also always discovering new ways to love me. One of the most important discoveries that I have made recently, is that it’s okay for me to accept that I am not okay, and allow myself space to grieve and give myself the time to heal. It’s loving to allow myself to feel these emotions. I used to always ‘bounce back’ so quickly from things, and ‘keep calm and carry on’ so much so that it was actually dishonest. I didn’t even do it consciously. It’s important to allow yourself to feel your emotions, whatever they are, and when they come, you just need to make sure you love yourself a little harder and take a little extra special care with yourself, perhaps add in a few surprises?

I accept the things I cannot change as quickly as possible, focus on the things I can, and rebuild from there. In doing so I am able to heal peacefully and probably much more efficiently than I ever did before. It also means I forgive as quickly as possible, and makes sure that I look forwards and backwards with only love.